Dating advice and relationship advice from the #1 trusted online dating site
Thursday, October 29, 2009
What She Tells Her Girlfriends
It’s not a big secret that women talk, but you need to understand the role of your woman's friends in her life and the life of your relationship. A woman's friends play the roles of sister, therapist and sometimes even a mother. What women tell or don’t tell their friends depends on their mood and how much they are into you. Among her girlfriends, happiness is shared jubilantly; however, dissatisfaction will be dissected.
A lack of communication in a relationship can be a source of frustration and women will turn to their friends when they need an outlet. When girl talk turns bawdy, many guys fall under immense scrutiny because unlike men, women talk about their problems, normally disclose intimate details and get relationship ideas from one another. The more you make your woman feel special, the more positive her conversations about you will be with her girlfriends. As long as you treat your woman good, you won’t have to worry about any possible embarrassment down the road.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Choosing A Date Venue
So you've got that first date with a hot girl. You pick up your date, hand her a dozen red roses and you’ve even offered to pick the restaurant--but which one do you choose?
Certain types of venues are just not appropriate for dates. When considering good dating ideas, the key here is to be a little imaginative and thoughtful. When it comes to a dinner date, women want something that’s not too cheap, but also not too expensive--a place that falls in between fancy and cheap, so that it doesn’t look like you’re trying too hard or that you’re not trying hard enough.
Taking your date out to a fast food joint tells her that you’re cheap and that you really don't care to impress her. On the other hand, taking her to the most expensive restaurant in town could make her think that you’re just a show off and a fake. Find a place to dine that’s not too cheap and not too expensive, but just right.
If your goal is to have a more fun and casual date, venues such as amusement parks, sports events, and picnics are great for first dates. Don't give your date the wrong impression by bringing her to a place where there are very little to no people. You do want to scare her by doing that, so stay in public places so your date will feel safe.
Follow these tips when choosing a venue for your dates and you will be glad when your dating partner wants to see you for many more.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Top Reasons Why Women Cheat
You have a hot girlfriend, a solid relationship and she would never cheat on you... right? Wrong. You should never underestimate a woman's willingness to stray because women can be just as unfaithful as men in relationships--especially if you're not taking care of your business at home. Here are some reasons why women cheat.
1. Lack of intimacy
The one thing women want most in a relationship is intimacy. It’s not just sex that makes women feel connected in a relationship--it’s things like touching, kissing and communicating. Women crave intimacy it, and they could seek it elsewhere if they're not getting it at home. To achieve better intimacy and give your woman a sense of closeness, spend quality time with her and do special things like massaging her feet, preparing a romantic dinner for two, etc... Routine sex in the same position and the same setting can become very boring, but an affair could add adventure and get her adrenalin flowing. Doing unexpected things like surprising her with a weekend getaway and having date nights can add that same kind of excitement to your relationship.
2. She Feels neglected and ignored
Women want to feel wanted; however, if they feel more like servants instead of your girlfriend, they could stray. Also, spending all your time at work or out with the fellas when you are off gives her even more reason to seek attention elsewhere. Women are emotional beings and they need their men to be present in the relationship and provide emotional support to them. Once you start neglecting and ignoring your relationship-- cheating is inevitable.
3. Revenge for your cheating
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Because you cheated, you broke her trust (and, possibly her heart) and she wants to hurt you the same way you hurt her. You can’t undo your indiscretions, but you can ask for her forgiveness, assure her it will never happen again and suggest relationship counseling to help the two of you. To regain her trust, it’s not enough just to tell her you’re sorry--you'll have to show her with actions.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
How to Listen to a Woman
Women love to communicate, and you will always find them encouraging their men to do the same. Unfortunately, most men don't realize that a woman's idea of communication means actually listening to what she has to say and understanding her as well as relating to her problems without judging her or providing unwanted advice.
It's no secret--men and women have very different communication styles. Women primarily talk to explore their feelings, while men primarily talk to find solutions. But if you want your relationship to work, you need to learn how to listen to her properly and learn what not to say to your girlfriend.
For women, talking and sharing are bonding experiences which help them build relationships. They learn how and who to trust by communicating and paying attention to the smallest of details. Whenever your partner speaks, listen carefully, make eye contact and ask questions about her feelings. Tell her you see how the situation could be upsetting, difficult or frustrating to her and encourage her to open up without offering any solutions or trying to change her feelings.
Try not to be sarcastic as doing such will insult her intelligence. Give her your undivided attention and remember--you don't have to agree with your partner, just listen and try to understand. Make sure that you're not watching the game while she's trying to discuss your one-year anniversary together. Most importantly, listen for clues in her speech, e.g., she tells you that there isn't enough sex in the relationship. Translate that as she's really telling you that she wants more of you. Better intimacy is a good thing, right?
When you learn how to properly listen to a woman, she will feel understood, respected and reassured and it will lead to fewer communication problems in the relationship. If you value your relationship, you should listen to her. Otherwise, you run the risk of having her find another man who will!
When She Acts Like Your Mom
During casual dating in some relationships, a woman may be independent, flexible, go out of her way to comfort you when your sick and listen to your problems. However, as soon as you’re in a committed relationship with her, she switches from care-taking to becoming a controlling woman--being over-bearing, constantly nagging and lecturing you like you're still a child.
Not all women want to be mothers; however, most women tend to carry on the traits they learn from their mothers (whether good or bad) and focus all their nurturing instincts toward the closest person to them--which in this case would be you! Although this nurturing may seem great at first, having your relationship change from a loving and equal partnership to parent-child roles can be the end of any romance between the two of you. Some guys tend to bring the nagging and lecturing on themselves by procrastinating on things or having outlandish spending habits, etc...It’s no secret that women mature faster than men, so the two of you may not be on the same maturity levels.
In most cases, the nurturing or nagging comes out of genuine affection and concern for you. A potential reason for her to treat you like a child is because you’re acting like one. The more you act like you’re ten years old, the greater the chance she’s going to keep giving you that mom stare. When she treats you like a child, you can stop the negative results of her maternal instinct and motherly behavior by acting like a man. Calmly and rationally explain your behaviors and/or desires and point out to her that you are an adult and fully capable of making your own decisions. If you regularly demonstrate that you are a strong, independent and self-sufficient man, she will be less likely to think of you as a child and you both can get back to a loving, equal partnership.
Not all women want to be mothers; however, most women tend to carry on the traits they learn from their mothers (whether good or bad) and focus all their nurturing instincts toward the closest person to them--which in this case would be you! Although this nurturing may seem great at first, having your relationship change from a loving and equal partnership to parent-child roles can be the end of any romance between the two of you. Some guys tend to bring the nagging and lecturing on themselves by procrastinating on things or having outlandish spending habits, etc...It’s no secret that women mature faster than men, so the two of you may not be on the same maturity levels.
In most cases, the nurturing or nagging comes out of genuine affection and concern for you. A potential reason for her to treat you like a child is because you’re acting like one. The more you act like you’re ten years old, the greater the chance she’s going to keep giving you that mom stare. When she treats you like a child, you can stop the negative results of her maternal instinct and motherly behavior by acting like a man. Calmly and rationally explain your behaviors and/or desires and point out to her that you are an adult and fully capable of making your own decisions. If you regularly demonstrate that you are a strong, independent and self-sufficient man, she will be less likely to think of you as a child and you both can get back to a loving, equal partnership.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Dealing With Controlling Women
While men are often guilty of being controlling in a relationship, their are a great deal of men who feel controlled by their overpowering women. Controlling Women believe that men and relationships should run no way but their way and will even convince their men that it's for their own good. Many men find themselves at the complete mercy of their women -- and do nothing about it!
So, how do you know if you have a controlling woman? Some of the traits of a controlling woman are controlling conversations, attempting to prove you wrong and constantly attempting to rewrite past events to make their point. These dictators break down a man's confidence in himself little by little until the man begins to believe he is nothing without her. They must be right at all times and use a great deal of coercion and intimidation to force you into agreeing with them, i.e. threatening to leave you if you don't do as she says.
With these drama queens, you will constantly find yourself on the defensive, having to explain all your actions and words. Controlling women will take full control of how you furnish and decorate your home. She will demand that you drop your hobbies and participate in her activities. They will make you wait, but will not wait for you.
A controlling woman will tell you when you can go out, when you can invite the guys over to watch the game and will even call you 10-15 times per day to keep track on what you're doing, who you're with and where you're going next with each call. These bossy women are manipulative and intimidating. They are often so good at this that they can make the man feel he is the one responsible for making her angry or upset. Controlling women believe that they know what's best for their men and will begin selecting the clothes you wear, choosing what movies you'll watch and deciding what you should or shouldn't eat.
These women are never wrong, and everything is always the man's fault. These women control men by shaming them for their thoughts, actions, every time you voice an opinion and will never try to understand your views. They will tell you that you're spending too much money and will eventually become in complete control of your pay check. These women will encourage you to not work as much and will even go as far as to encourage you to quit your job so you can spend more time with them.
Controlling women are in a much larger power struggle within themselves than they are with the men they boss around. Often, men will allow these controlling behaviors to "keep the peace" in their relationships. But, you must remember--love does not mean that you have to give up your opinions, values and friends for her. Love also doesn't mean that you have to let manipulative women make every decision in your life.
Do you have a hard time remembering the last time you had an opinion? Do you recall your last decision? If you're in this situation, it may be time to for you to reconsider your relationship and regain control of your life unless you like having your life ran for you and your opinions made by someone else.
Friday, October 9, 2009
She Likes To Party Without You
One of the keys to a happy relationship is embracing your girlfriend’s circle of friends and accepting them for all their many quirks. But what happens when your girlfriend loves to party with her friends far more than she wants to spend time with you?
All women have a group of friends, but in this type of relationship, fun time with their girlfriends take priority over you. If you want some alone time and the girls want to go to out, you lose. This type of woman can’t figure out why you would be upset being alone at the house waiting up for her while she is out partying all night with women at bars, drinking herself into a stupor. Instinctively, guys wanting a serious relationship seek out more normal, down-to-earth women, especially when thinking of marriage and children and don't find this behavior sexy among women.
If you're looking for a serious relationship with a woman with wife material, avoiding this type of woman would be in your best interest. They don't settle down comfortably and rarely find themselves in good relationships.
Dating Club Girls
Club girls are nothing more than fantasy women whom every man lusts after. They have beautiful faces with full lips, big doe eyes, great legs, and all the curves you could ever ask for. The problem in dating these women is that they love to wear clothes that also show off her great assets not just to you, but to every Tom, Dick and Harry on the street.
These are the party girls that you see in the clubs with a different guy every night in short skirts dancing to the latest sexually charged song with their hands on the floor and butts in the air showing everyone what God gave them.
While some of these women at clubs say they're “just having a good time”, a man seeking a serious relationship would have to question women who allow complete strangers to come up behind them and grind their privates with only a thong separating it from being intercourse. These women are more than likely to hang around in the clubs without you and act like they're single for the most part. They don’t just demand a large amount of attention from you, but they seek it from other men as well.
Another problem with dating club girls is dealing with the countless amounts of men that will stare when the both of you go out in public. One man is never going to be sufficient for this type of woman. You can tell this type of woman how much you love her and how gorgeous she is, but in her mind your compliments rate right up there with stares from strangers.
While some guys like to go out and find women like this, keep in mind that club girls are simply booty call material and they definitely do not show any of the traits that makes a woman marriage material.
Dating Women With Emotional Baggage
Women with emotional baggage are those who have been repeatedly hurt and stomped on by men. No matter what the cause, the romantic lives of the these women are dictated by their damaged psychology. They live in worlds of chaotic emotion where logic has no place and they carry that psychological damage and unresolved anger into new relationships.
These women are angry at men in general and their entire mental stability rests on the guy being totally normal, which we aren’t. Sometimes they are still feeling the effects of a nasty break-up, a recent negative experience with a man or sometimes the aftermath of being physically abused.
Some of the signs of emotional baggage include women getting paranoid about every aspect of a new relationship, i.e. every night you don’t call or you saying something a little off beat is received as threatening to her sanity. Everything must be in perfect line to not upset her delicate emotional balance. If another woman calls you on the phone, even if it’s your boss or a relative, she loses it, and goes into the grand questioning.
With women like this, it's always one step forward and 20 steps back. One day she's your best friend, the next she won't even speak to you. One minute she'll love you and the next she'll be picking fights or screaming at you for some imagined transgression on your part. She'll tell you she loves you and wants to do everything in her power to make sure the relationship lasts.
She will show interest and then suddenly and inexplicably become unavailable and you won't see her again for weeks or even months. When you do see her again, she'll start treating you like crap for no apparent reason. They are used to being around emotionally and physically abusive men--this is why many of these women who date jerks seek out emotionally unavailable men and avoid quality men. The nicer you are, the faster she'll run.
If you decide that she's worth the time and trouble, give her some space and emotional breathing room. These are women in dire need of professional therapy, so remember to be patient, be a good listener and learn to reach her at an emotional level and be the good man that she needs so she will learn to trust men again.
Dating Psychotic Women
The average man will date at least one psychotic woman during his lifetime, and most of those men will go to their graves still shuddering at the memory of such a relationship. The basic behaviors of a psychotic woman are constant temper tantrums, snooping, emotional blackmail. These women carry a tremendous amount of emotional baggage and will do things that are completely crazy, lacking rational thought and take actions with no thought about consequences. They scream and yell and sometimes are even violent and throw or break things.
Sometimes they do outrageous things like vandalize your car, or embarrass or harass you at work. When you finally do break up with them, they may even threaten you or your new girlfriend. You get the idea. These women are just plain crazy --and there is nothing you can do to change them my friend.
Most psychotic women do not appear to be like this right away. Often times it takes many months before their true colors start to show. Watch for early signs of psychosis, especially how she treats other people – as that is one key method for early detection of these combative women. One thing to be careful of -- women who are psychotic are often very passionate in nature and are most likely very good in bed. So when the sex starts off really hot, be extra careful because good sex can mask over a lot of things.
If you’re one of the many men currently trying to escape from the worst relationship of his life, you’re not alone. Your best strategy after you recognize that your woman is a psycho is to cut your losses immediately and get out while you still have your sanity and all your extremities-- hopefully before she gets too attached to you, as that might minimize potential bad behavior that directed toward you. Sure, you can continue dating a this type of woman -- but there will come a time when you may regret it.
How To Handle Running Into An Ex
It's over between you and her. You're both moving on, but sooner or later it's going to happen: You'll bump into an ex-girlfriend. A spur-of-the-moment run-in with your ex can often be an awkward experience, whether or not it’s something you wanted to happen. Sometimes you’re so caught off-guard that you say or do something you end kicking yourself for after she walks away. Here are some tips for how you can better handle running into your ex.
1. Ignore old feelings
When you see your ex walk in the room, take the time to focus on something else before you speak to her. You want to feel normal and at ease or else you may say or do something to make a fool out of yourself. Forget that you once cared for the girl and treat her as just another old distant friend.
2. Be kind to her
Chances are that running into her is not by choice and there are many innocent bystanders around, so force yourself to take the high road and be respectful to her just like you would with anyone else.
3. Keep the conversation short
If you keep things short, there is less time for anything awkward to be said. Say your hellos and avoid the long conversations of catching up. Don’t bring up old issues and don't allow your ex to make you wander down memory lane and re-kindle old times of love and tenderness. There’s no point to it; leave the past in the past. Even if you have lingering questions you'd like answered, you’re probably standing in a place where they're inappropriate to discuss anyway.
4. Bring up good things about your life
You don’t need to brag or throw your new girlfriend in your ex’s face, but you can mention something positive that’s going on in your life. For example, if your ex asks how your life is going, respond with, “It’s going great; I just got a new job, or something along those lines. Just make sure it’s true; otherwise, if you get caught in a lie, it will only make you look foolish.
Although it's always hard to see an ex, remind yourself why things didn’t work out. It is very important to remember that you broke up for a reason. You were not meant to be, so remember what it is that you want to have in your next relationship.
Check out our article on The 4 Types of Women You Should Date.
5 Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
Just because a relationship ends, it doesn’t mean that both people wanted it to or are ready to move on. When your ex-girlfriend is finally ready to reconcile your relationship, she's going to give off several obvious and subtle signals. She'll use words, body language, and other ways to give you the green light that she's ready to get back together. Here are 5 of the strongest signs that your ex wants to get back with you:
1. She still acts like your girlfriend
If she still does the same exact things she did as your girlfriend; in her mind she may still be your girlfriend.
2. She runs into you everywhere
If your ex-girlfriend seems to continuously run into you whether you are shopping at the mall or jogging in the park, shows up at old hangouts, parties or friends houses when you are there and makes other excuses to see you, it could mean she wants you back.
3. She asks about your love life
Your ex doesn't want you moving on if she's still attracted to you. So if another girl is mentioned during a conversation about your personal life and you see she is uncomfortable or angry, she still considers you her man and she wants you back. Furthermore, if she starts telling you she doesn't have a boyfriend yet, chances are she's trying to see if you're still interested.
4. She wants to talk about your breakup
She looks at you or touches you the same as when she first met you and talks about how things could have been better. She might even apologize for something she said, tell you about her regrets make a sincere effort to explain and make it right if she suspects that she's done something to upset or disappoint you.
5. She makes an effort to improve herself for you
She lets you know that she's doing her best to make herself more attractive to you. This includes working though inner issues, improving personal appearance, getting a better job or anything else that bugged you in the past.
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